AAAAAAAGH!!!!!!

On my last blog, I was talking about hope. The very next day I got a migraine so painful, I accidently overdosed slightly, I had a panic attack and totally thought I was going to die. My mom had to come home from work and just hold me for about an hour until I went to sleep. I had mixed acetaminophen and muscle cream along with my hard core anti-inflamatories prescribed by the doctor. I was on the computer when I got the aura, so that's why I haven't been on it again since. I just got brave enough to get on again, because today I got really, really pissed.

Since my husband left in April of last year, I have been trying to get to see the doctor. I applied to Medi-Cal again, and waited and waited for my cards. I called my worker. He said he would send me a temporary Medi-Cal card. I got it in a few days. More time goes by. I called my worker. Where's my permanent medical card? That WAS your permanent medical card, he says. Ok, but who's my dentist and doctor? Ok, I'll have them send you your information packet to fill out. You have to send it in by the deadline it gives you or you'll have to start all over again-ok? Ok.

I get my packet. On the doctor and dentist form there isn't a place to put my doctor choice. I put it on the form anyway. A month or so later, I get my dentist and dental card. I call my worker. Where's my doctor? He says, I don't know. Call this 800 number. So I call the 800 number. You're listed as having Kaiser, ma'am. What? You have to tell your worker to get Kaiser off of here. He's the only one who can do it. I call my worker. I had to leave a message. He didn't call me back for over a week and two messages later. I finally called the office to speak to his supervisor. Oh, he's in a meeting with everyone, and there's no one who can help you right now, sorry. Just leave another message.

I left a message for his supervisor, but got a call from him. I told him what happened and how he has to take Kaiser off my file. He said he would mail me a form. A few days later, I get the form. It looks like the wrong form. I called my worker. No that's the right form, just fill out this one little question, and send it back to me. I did. FINALLY, I got my medical card and my doctor. I made an appointment. I had to wait about three weeks, but it was today.

I am filling out the papers for new patients when I hear them call my name. They said, sorry, you are listed as having Kaiser. WHAT?!!!! We can't see you today, bye bye!

Furiously I head for the welfare office. I wasn't going to call that idiot again. I get to the window and the lady says I can't see my stupid worker because he isn't my worker anymore. I don't have a worker, right now. WHAT?!!! OH MY GOD! I HAVE to talk to someone today! Ok, the lady says, you can see the Worker of the Day.

FORTY MINUTES LATER! I go to the window, again, as I have had to do twice already. (This is their way to make you give up and go home, maybe?) Finally, I got to see the Worker of the Day. She says I have to get a letter from Kaiser stating that I don't have them anymore. What?

Now, let's take a second here, and look at all the technology in the world and figure out why these idiots can't just call each other, or fax the letter to Medi-Cal, or communicate in some way? Why do I have to do this?

I started crying. This HAS to work, I tell her! My migraines and allergies are out of control! This has been going on since APRIL! Come ON! She says I can just to to one of Kaiser's administrative offices and get the letter and then just bring it back to them. So I drive down to Kaiser. There is no parking. Not one space! It's the hospital, what was I thinking, anyway?

So I go home and call the member services 800 number. When I get through all the automated crap and finally get a person she says that Kaiser doesn't give letters. They will take the K-code off of me and that will take 24 to 48 BUSINESS hours to complete. I said, but Medi-Cal told me to get a letter! What if this doesn't work? She said it WILL work, and that it may be Medi-Cal's policy to ask for a letter, but it isn't Kaiser's policy. Their policy is to do the K-code thing. Bye!

So that's where I am now, waiting for almost a week to get this K-code thing off my file. I will make another appointment with my doctor, but I'm going to check my eligibility before I go in. I am soooo pissed right, now!

Nobody cares about you when you are on Medi-Cal. Nobody has any sympathy for you. It doesn't matter that your life is falling apart. It's just not their policy.

This Year (so far)

Ok, so far this year is freaking great!

I haven't thought about whathisname is so long. This makes me VERY happy. It might truely be time to move on. I want to know how everyone feels about dating at work. There is a smoking hot guy at work and I'm very curious about him. But should I even bother and what if it dosen't work out? Awkward? I've been trying to give it some real thought here. I don't need to jack-up my life anymore than it is.

Oh my god he is fine! I find myself trying to find ways to talk to him. He's always so nice and sends me email's sometimes with a ;-). How cute is that? He's smells good too. I don't know help me out guys!!

The other GREAT, WONDERFUL & AMAZING thing in my life? I don't want to jinx it, but I (maybe) getting a promotion. With a raise and bounes every three months, so keep yuou fingers crossed for me.

So far, so good. If January is this good, can you imagine how this REST of the year might go?

Crap!

Last Wednesday, I was let go from the first of my two part-time jobs. I am pretty sad and also happy.

I am sad because I will be even poorer and I will miss my boss. He was the most kind and understanding boss I have ever had. He never minded when I had a migraine, and was indeed very concerned for me when I did. He was generous in my pay per hour, and birthday and Christmas gifts. I will never forget "Sir."

I am happy I am not there anymore because I didn't get along very well with Sir's secretary. She was always crabby and short-tempered. She used to snap at me almost everyday I was there. She made me so nervous that I had a hard time learning. (I have been learning very well at my second job because they are so laid back.) Everything had to be perfect, and nobody's perfect.

I had just begun to "get it," when I was let go. They just didn't have enough work for me.

I went to work at my only job, now, yesterday. I had a full day, and got a lot done. Nobody there thinks things have to be perfect. Not even the boss, who is Sir's best friend. I hope work doesn't run out there, too. I really like it there. I am hoping that someday, they'll hire me full time. I wouldn't have to worry about my migraines because my boss there is also very understanding, and much more laid back than Sir.

Besides, I am going to the doctor at the end of the month, and am hoping allergy shots will cause me to have much fewer migraines. Then I'll only have my emotional problems to deal with, which I must say is getting better. I am beginning to think I may not need anti-depressants. This has just been a hard time in my life. After all, I AM getting divorced and being forced back into the work place with this debilitating condition.

But for some reason, I am feeling really strong today. I usually feel weak and ineffective when I lose a job, but today I feel like I'll be able to take care of myself and my son once I begin my allergy shots. It must be HOPE.

To grami darling

Thiss is for you grami darling... Hey guys guess what, my mommy is going to let me get my bellybutton pierced....
this is so kool.